The Strength of a Noble Daughter

From the moment I first saw you, I knew in my heart that you were the one for me. Every time I looked in to your eyes, I felt something unexplainable. I felt that I have know you for years. But how could it be possible, I wandered! I wondered every time I saw you. You lived in the eastern side of the country and I, in the northern side.  Could it be that we know each other in a past life? Or am I just imagining things – I wondered many times.

Then I found answers to this un explainable feeling from a book that I read. It said; when two people are equal in faith, virtue, generosity and wisdom they can be reborn together in their next lives. That was when I knew, in this journey of birth and death we must have developed equal confidence in the Supreme Buddha, the Noble dhamma and the Noble Sangha. Together, we must have formed a pleasant mind about this well proclaimed Dhamma that does not change with time. And together we must have associated with the Noble Sangha with a gladdened mind, together we must have observed and protected the five precepts to the same extent. Together we must have observed the 8 precepts on full moon, Uposatha days and lead a serene and celibate life, free from household duties. We must have practiced generosity by giving alms to the Noble Sangha and those who are in need. We must have let go our greediness and stinginess in the same way. Not only that, Aeron, we must have listened, discussed and contemplated on the meanings of the Noble Dhamma together by developing the same level of wisdom. Its clear to me now! Although we had to leave each other in our pat life we’re here again together in this life because we possess equal faith, equal virtue, equal generosity and equal wisdom.

But dear Aeron, for past 15 years, we’ve been together, I have never seen you this much ill and physically weak. Seeing you suffer in this way hurts me a lot. Although we both try to hide it from each other, I am sure we both know that you will lose your life very soon. May be the next moment. And I know that scares you. But Aeron, do not let this fear overcome you.

I know your head is full of concerns about me and our children. You must be worried about what will happen to us when you are gone. Oh! Aeron, do not think like that. You supported us for the past 10 years in the best way you could. Now its my turn. I still have strength in my hands. I can go back to my job and support my self and the children.

And if you are worried that I’ll re-marry after you pass away, do not even give it a second thought. Aeron, both you and I know very well about the faithful life we lead for the past 15 years. From the moment I fell in love with you, I have never even thought of another man, what more to say about a physical relationship. I will continue to live this household celibate life we lead for the past 2 years. Aeron, know that, only you will be in my heart.

I know you were the one who always took us to the monastery. And I know you are wondering who will take us to the monastery, how to associate with the Noble monks and participate in meritorious deeds after your passing away. But don’t worry Aeron, when you are gone I will be even more keen to visit the monastery to observe the 8 precepts on full moon poya days. Oh! Dear Aeron, please don’t die with unfulfilled expectorations and concerns. To die full of concerns is painful. To die full of concern has been criticized by the Supreme Buddha, the Fortunate One.

Aeron, I know both you and I rejoiced in observing 8 precepts on Uposatha days. The internal serenity it gives cannot be describe in words. I know you are worried that I won’t be able to continue my virtuous and serene life when you’re gone. But Aeron, don’t you doubt that for a second. From the moment that I took refuge in the Noble Triple Gems, I do not remember breaching the precepts that I observed intentionally. Aeron, I lead a regretless life. And that regretless life helps me to calm my mind and attain internal peace. I assure you that I will continue to meditate and live even more serene life than before.

I know you are still thinking that I’m unstable in this Dhamma path. But dear Aeron, do not think in that way. Now one can change my confidence in our great teacher, the Supreme Buddha. No one can convince me that there exists another Dhamma that leads to True Happiness. No one can change the pleasant mind I have for the Sangha. Aeron, I have a firm foothold in the Dhamma and have gotten rid of all doubt. So keep no worries. Dear Aeron, please do not die with unfulfilled hopes and expectations. To die full of concern is painful. To doe fill concern has been criticized by the Fortunate One.

We have equal confidence in the Noble Triple Gems, we are equal in Virtue, generosity and wisdom. So if we wish, we have the chance to be together in the next life as well. But dear Aeron, think beyond that. Think about the amount of tears you had shed in this samsara when you had to separate from the ones you loved. The Fortunate One had taught us the amount of tars we have shed when we were separated from our mother, our father, spouse and children are much greater than the water in the four great oceans. I do not want you to add a single tear drop more into this sea of tears. Its due to many merits that we were born in this human life. Oh! Dear Aeron, my love, make use of this great opportunity and make this our first and final separation where we never shed a single drop of tear hereafter.